Rant on kids and parents.

[plunkybug]

I am truly dismayed in some of the posts lately in childfree. It seems that there is so much negativity and hatred toward children. I may or may not have children in the future, and therefore I am childfree, by at least my definition (by theirs I would be called childless), and I do not hate children. There are plenty of people who never want to have children of their own, for their own reasons, and love kids. I may have to withdraw my membership if they continue the negativity. It is one thing to not have kids by choice, and another to applaud a woman grabbing her 3 year old daughter by the hair and dragging her to the car after running loose in a mall parking lot (or advocating the use of a permanent leash...how demeaning!). The kid is fucking 3 years old!! They're going to act like it too. It is the parent's responsibility to watch out for the child's safety and well being. If that means carrying your 3 year old while out in a parking lot because they are know to run around (as young kids do) then so be it. Hold hands tightly if need be. Be a good parent and don't be cruel or abusive to the kid like that just to get the message across. That harbors resentment and anger and could cause more bad habits in the future. Find another way of reprimanding th kid for doing that that is not hurtful, but gets the message across. Just actually do your job as a parent. Truly these hateful people have never gotten the love from a child that is so pure, and infectious. It would be good for them if they did.

Comments

[wundermuffin.livejournal.com]

WOW.

i am truly glad these people never plan to have children.

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

I guess so. Let's hope our freedoms remain so that if they do end up preggers, they'll be able to do what they want rather than raise a child and hate that or neglect them, or whatever. Though there is the possibilty that once they have gone through everything with the pregnancy and delivery, that maybe they'd come around.

[glittergrrl69.livejournal.com]

Yea, that is a possibility. But don't assume that's always true. I have heard numerous stories of the mother going through everything and it doesn't change her feelings at all. Many of the people I work with were products of these households.

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

I don't doubt it happens. Look at all the neglect that is still out there.

[wundermuffin.livejournal.com]

maybe, but i tend to doubt it. i think that if you hate children, then you probably won't be a good parent - my dad doesn't mind children, but just doesn't UNDERSTAND them, and that was bad enough!

[warzau-kitten.livejournal.com]

I am sick of these child haters. I was kind of upset when I saw you are part of that community a while back but I just really never said anything to you because it is not my business.
However it is fucked up what they say on there all the time even a year a go.
I also am upset at one of the women on my friends list, she said some pretty fucked up stuff about kids and how much she hates kids and being around them on her LJ

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

The info page says that not everyone there hates kids, but it is their opinion and right to feel that way. I may very well be childfree the rest of my life, but I certainly don't hate kids. I don't understand how you can hate kids. Are they not human? Are they not what you used to be? I can understand that many have little patience for the growing up process, or the behaviour patterns, and those people tend not to have their own, but hate is so strong.

I don't get to read it that often, but when I do, it is so negative nearly all the time. I am seriously gonna put up a post and withraw my membership. I would like to find a community where people like me are there, where they don't hate children, but they don't want any of their own, at least for a while, if ever.

[warzau-kitten.livejournal.com]

oh I know what the info page says but go back
and read...It has beena good 6 months since I read but damn all they do is GO OFF about kids in public, kids they are related to, friends having babies..
they have a nasty negative opinion and are greatly repulsed by children in general.

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

I will have to take some time and reread the posts, get ammo, and then post.

[glittergrrl69.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I used to belong to a childfree page before the guy who ran it closed it down. It was good to have a place to rant about the products of bad parents. But there were so many people who were so angry, it gave the entire group a bad vibe/name.
Just a suggestion: take it easy on your withdrawl post. It's 98% likely that you won't be able to change their minds if they feel that strongly about it. Most you'll do is annoy the crap out of them and give them more ammo to be negative about. Just state your piece simply and without judgement. Even better, create your own "child-positive childfree" site and tell people about it in your withdrawl post. That way you don't have to do any finger wagging - the purpose of your group will say volumes.

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

I know I won't change their mind, but I want them to know why I am leaving. Heh, yeah, I could create my own community, something like: childfreenotchildhaters

[lorelei-aisling.livejournal.com]

Yeah, some of those people on that community have some real issues. I'm amazed at the hatred on that thing.

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

Yeah. Now that I have had some time to think about it, I am going to put up a post about withdrawing, and why. I would still like to be part of a group that discusses issues with not having children, thoughts and feelings, etc. No kid bashing for sure.

[ex-sandcat309.livejournal.com]

I love kids and those people (not all) make me ill. I can't believe that people would actually wish people bodily harm

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

I can't believe the people who advocated a leash all the time. How demeaning! the only child I would advocate the harness style leash would be an autistic child, or a child with some disorder. The hand to had one, well, maybe, but there has to be a different way.

[ex-sandcat309.livejournal.com]

I would not even put a an Autistc chid on a leash. Children are not animals. Autistic children are wonderful children

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

I suppose it depended on the actual child, and how they acted, adn what age they were, and how many dangerous situations they put themselves in on a regualr basis.

Let me rephrase what I posted above...the only child I would *consider* a harness style leash for...

[ex-sandcat309.livejournal.com]

well me being a Special Ed Teacher, I love all kids. I do not think any kid belongs on a leash. However, I respect your opinions :)

[wundermuffin.livejournal.com]

agreed! i've worked with PLENTY of high-maintenance autistic children and next week will start teaching a class of 9 autistic girls, and i don't think i've ever met one i wanted to put on a leash.

[ex-sandcat309.livejournal.com]

awesome. I too am a Special Ed teacher

[suspended-dusk.livejournal.com]

People should be ranting more about bad parents.

It's not children in general that's the problem. It's people.

More women need to either use proper birth control, get their tubes tied, or stop having sex. Men are just as responsible and need to be held more accountable by law.

There are too many fucked up and unwanted children on an already overpopulated Earth.

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

Yup yup. And now Sandra O'Connor has left an open seat for Bush to fill....and who will he fill it with? Likely to be a stealth moderate, someone who looks decent on the surface, but who will still push the agenda. Deceptive. Or maybe he will be stupid to nominate some blatant fundie and we can continue to shoot his choices down.

[starra74.livejournal.com]

I don't hate children, but I will say that I've never receive anything like "love from a child that is so pure, and infectious."

I've gotten puke, spit, shit, piss, paint, toys over the head and talked back to from a child, but never love.

And if my child development courses were correct, you don't get love from children until they are about 4 to 6 years old.

Before that, it's just need, need, need.

Like I said, I don't hate them, but I keep a wide berth from children, most housepets and houseplants for a reason.

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

And your views are totally fine. I am on birth control for a reason, though I admit that I love seeing the gleam in my friend's kids eyes when they run up to me and want me to play with them, or hug them, etc. But yeah, they are all older than 4, and children do need a lot. They have to. If they could do it on their own from the start, we wouldn't care for them as long as we do.